Reflection

two months of hard work... 

about a hundred unpaid hours clocked... 

milling around unnoticed by the world... 

all for seven minutes and 6 seconds of one night...

...

Someone once asked me how it felt to work so hard for so little recognition and exposure in a field where such mattered more than any other award, prize, and achievement. And in return, I found it appropriate to smile and ask, in return, if that person understood how it felt to love someone, unconditionally, unceasingly, but never be able to say or do anything direct about it. To have an unrequited love and passion for that which has none for you in return. When the person confirmed having felt the like at least once before in their life, I explained, casually, "THAT'S how it feels to do what I do."

Yes, the hurt of knowing the relationship is one way is one of the most difficult emotions most have trouble dealing with. It may cause illusions, delusions, and the like, but because I know that God has my best in His hands... I'll not give up! NEVERRRR!!

...

Passion Revived In Creatively Engineered Locomotives Entertaining Saved Sinners

Praise the Lord for He is gooooooood!

Guarding your heart for DUMMIES like me

I’ve been learning a lot about guarding my heart from men. Its always been a strange and broad topic that I usually put on the back burner to figure out at a later time, but lately i’ve been forced to deal with it for my own heart’s sake. So i’ve compiled a list of practical steps based on my own experiences that has helped me… or I hope is helping me.

(This is from a girl’s perspective, sorry guys)

1. If you know he likes a song or a certain song reminds you of him, try not to listen to it. Listening to the song is like embedding him into your mind for 3 minutes at a time. Instead, listen to songs that remind you of your relationship with Jesus because you will probably end up listening to that stuff anyway if this guy breaks your heart.

2. Do not talk to him on the phone or chat with him into the wee hours of the morning. You’re probably tired and vulnerable and will most likely say things you don’t mean to say. Plus, a good guy would respect your sleep time… unless you’re an insomniac or something.

3. If he says something sweet and you catch yourself swooning, imagine him saying it to your mom.

4. If he’s really good looking, try not to stare so much. Getting distracted by his good looks is like a hot knife going through the shield of butter you’re trying to guard your heart with.

5. Use caution when encouraging him. Men are easily flattered and as women we like seeing them flattered and happy, so we use it as a weapon sometimes.

6. If he smells good….. don’t smell him.

7. If he says you look pretty, calm down and seriously ask him what else he likes and hope he says something legit about your character because one day you’ll probably be ugly. You keep him with what you catch him with.

8. Limit the one on one time you spend with him. In my opinion, wasting time with a guy is the best way a girl builds emotional attachments.

9. If you see him playing with kids…… RUN

10. Pray! This is the most important part. God is the best defender of your heart.

Sharing this has made me really wish it was possible to just type out a list on how to guard your heart or have some some formula to follow, but we all know it’s not that simple. The heart has ways I will never understand. I guess that’s the beauty of it.

Missions NO-NO!

While correcting and typing my missions letter (because it's due tomorrow, this Sunday!), I came across a passage I had written while listening to Pompeii by E.S. Posthumus (which I am listening to right now!), and chuckled. So, I wanted to share with you guys! Please, tell me what you think!

"At times, during my challenging trip, I feel as though I am the underdog of the television series, “Survivor.” In every situation, I’ve always come out last and am close to being defeated by the complete level of insecurity and discomfort around me. But, when I finish my challenge and see the smiles and receive the hugs from my students; that is my crowning prize. And, in return, I’ve become tougher. I’ve learned to keep myself clean, bathing in rivers because of lack of plumbing, and eating what was necessary to keep me afloat, out of my own volition. Clearly, I am far under-qualified to survive the television series, but my accomplishments thus far are far greater than what I had originally planned to achieve. "

For a while, I struggled with writing my missions letter because I wasn't allowed to mention "mission", "missionary", or "spread the gospel" in my support letters because of the implications and unseen threats attached to it all. Unseen by me and those around me, but censured and blocked by the Chinese government. Oh, the woe of it all!!

However, I was reminded of Ruth and her love for 'Alias'. True, it's different, but quite similar, wouldn't you agree? After all, we're all secret agents being sent into the battlefields of dangers unknown to spread peace/love and not hate. Drops chocolates and not bombs! Make steak, not war! And then my writing of the support letter became easier because, when you write with your heart, and the facts are clear before you, there's no haze that you must muddle through to get your point across. No amount of flowery can hide your intentions. No, make it simple and put it out there, "I want to go to China and rediscover my roots in hopes of giving back." and they can say nothing, because I sound like a history friend with a need to plant trees. 

Praise the Lord! =) I hope you all are well!

New Video!

So, "Agape Intermedia" did a wedding recently! On March 15th, 2009, which explained why Crystal, Mike, Becca, and I left HOC so early and couldn't be found until later at night! I had fun, though my arms shook a lot and it was the first wedding I've done on my own as the only videographer! Wah! So nervous, but because my brother and sisters were there, I feel as though they really liked us and =) it was all good as gravy. Anyways, here's the video of the highlight reel and I hope you guys like it because, well, at first I didn't want to share it with you guys because this site is so inactive, but if I don't... who will? 


A&J Highlight Reel from Tiff Chai on Vimeo.

HISTORY MAKERS ALL THE WAAAAAAY!!!

~ Love you all!!! :D Tiffrz

Taiwanerica?

On the way home from work, at like, 9 AT NIGHT!, I was driving on Colima which became Golden Springs, and I was wondering why the cars were going so slow in my lane. I looked over and saw that a group of bikers took up most of the space around the right lane. 

Let me rephrase, a group of 12-13 bicyclists with their flashing lights rode at night. 10-speeds, trick bikes, biker bikes, whatever. And I had to smile. What if they wore signs on their back advertising God instead of just conserving energy, getting fit, and not polluting?

Praise the Lord for good ideas and inspirations!

(*Taiwanerica because I felt like I was in Taiwan for a moment, and how interestingly hard it would be to bike home... UP GRAND... wow. hehe... HOW FUN!!!)